Are you a leader or a follower?

Do you challenge the norm or follow it.

Are you concerned about what people think of you, do you live your passion or are you a sheep following the herd?

Dare to be different…

Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules, and they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify and vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as crazy, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

Now is the time for you to step into your power and all the talents and abilities you have.  Now is the time for you to make a difference in the world by being you. No more playing small…play to win.  You create the rule, you define success!

It’s a choice,  go for it!

Leave me your comments and let me know what you think of this!

The Gift of Listening
Posted By: Richard B. Brooke
Date Posted: July 10, 2009

Ever been chatting with someone and, before you can even finish your sentence, they interrupt to share their own thought or finish yours for you? Or perhaps you are in the middle of making an important point and their attention is pulled away as they check their ringing cell phone, send an email or reply to a text message. We’ve all watched someone we are talking to nod and even mutter “uh huh” – knowing all the while they didn’t really hear a word we just said.

These are conversations that leave people feeling unheard and unimportant, and they happen to all of us every day. In fact, most of us are guilty on a regular basis of listening to others in this same way.

You have all heard the cliché about why humans have two ears and only one mouth. The level at which I intend to encourage you to listen here, would require that cliché to be updated to a ratio of four or five ears to one mouth. If you think about how easy it is to offend someone with your mouth and how impossible it is to offend someone with your ears … well, you get the point.

Listening at the level described here is a discipline and an art that will pay big dividends in your personal relationships and in your business endeavors.

When you practice this level of listening, you will provide people around you with a gift that they have rarely been given in their lifetime.

The Gift of Listening is simply listening with a commitment to hear exactly what another person is saying. Hearing what they are intending to say but are not; even hearing what they are purposely not saying. More importantly, it is hearing what the other person is feeling … their words merely an attempt at expressing those feelings. You may be feeling scared or mad or sad or happy. The artful listener will feel what it is you feel, and let you know the communication has landed.

Listening at this level requires, first and foremost, a commitment to “source” the other person. This is an emotional and spiritual gift. You must be willing to give the other person the validation, acknowledgment and esteem they are seeking.

Think about what really happens when two people come together in a conversation. They could be talking about the weather, sports, politics, business or simply what they did last weekend. Each person comes to the conversation with an unconscious addiction to “being heard.” They want the other person to hear their point, their story, their opinion, their accomplishments, and their feelings on the subject. They are usually politely persistent, and they want the last word.

Imagine what it looks like, sounds like and feels like to have these two agendas collide. Neither person is heard; neither is validated. Feelings are hurt or, at best, not nurtured. The result is an emotional train wreck. Empowerment, self-esteem, friendship, relationship and love are overlooked — or even damaged.

Giving the gift of listening starts with you setting aside, for the moment, your agenda to be sourced in a conversation.

Just make the commitment at the beginning of the conversation to have it be “all about the other person.” You do not have to do this in every conversation, just the ones in which your goal is for the other person to walk away feeling better about themselves than before they spoke to you. Funny, but in every case they will also feel better about you … much better than if you tried to create the same feelings by making the dialogue “all about you.”

The second thing you must do to listen at this level, is to start listening with your body, your heart and your intuition — instead of your mind.

The superficial way you and I were taught in school to listen, is with our conscious mind. That is the part of our mind that discerns between right and wrong, hot and cold, good and bad. It is the part of us that has formed opinions on everything we have ever heard, read, experienced or just thought about. Most of us go through life managing our affairs with all the information and opinions we have amassed in our conscious mind.

When using your conscious mind to listen, the result looks like an argument or a competition, or that you just plain aren’t interested. I tell you about my weather and you respond by telling me about yours. The thing is, I don’t care about your weather and you don’t care about mine. I tell you what I did this weekend and you think doing that is a waste of time. I tell you I think so-and-so should have done things this way and you disagree, if not verbally at least that is what you are thinking … and how you are listening.

There are other parts of you designed for far superior listening. Your body actually listens. It feels impressions of whether things said are true or false, authentic or contrived. It uses your emotions, your intuition, your unconscious mind all wrapped up in a spiritual self that, given the opportunity, can really hear the entire message. Again, it is hearing what is said, what is intended to be said, what is not said, and what is felt.

To give yourself the opportunity to listen with these tools, you must have a clear intention to use them and not use your conscious mind. You accomplish this by agreeing to source the other person. To do this you will want to quiet your mind. Listen from a clean slate. Wipe clean your opinions about this person. Wipe clean from your thoughts what you want out of this conversation, other than to completely and fully be there for this person.

Wipe clean the mindless chatter that keeps you from being fully present in this moment for this person and for what they want you to hear. This means if you hear your mind commenting on what the other person is saying, you stop yourself and recommit or “represence” yourself. Do this throughout the conversation as often as you need to, in order to stay present.

The third step to the Gift of Listening is to take a look at what is referred to as your habitual listening or your “already, always listening.”

Each of us has at least one habitual listening we use to filter conversations.

Habitual Listenings

• I already know this; therefore, I do not really need to listen.
• Get to the point. I do not have time for all the preamble.
• I know where you are going with this and will help you get to the end.
• Whatever you have, I have better. Hurry up and finish so I can show you mine.
• I disagree with your position; therefore I will not listen further.
• I am preoccupied with my own life story; I cannot pay attention to yours.
• I am so overwhelmed with who you are, I cannot hear what you are saying.

Identify your habitual listenings and practice recognizing when they are in play. Knowing about them, and being willing to shut them off, is half the battle.

Here are some new Empowering Habitual Listenings you may replace them with:

• I am here to hear all you have to say.
• I am here to feel all you are feeling.
• I am here to hear what you are not saying, as well.
• I am here to source you, to empower you, to get what it is you want me to get about you.
• It is all about you today.
• Your story is the only story.
• Your opinions carry opportunities for me to learn.
• Your concerns are valid for you and today are my concerns, as well.
• Today I see things through your eyes, hear through your ears and feel with your heart.
• In this conversation, you speak and I listen … really listen.

The fourth step is to ask Hunch-Led Questions.

During these kinds of conversations you will feel questions that might be asked, either for clarification or to further the conversation down a path. Hunch-led questions need to be asked. Asking them will enrich the discussion. They are questions almost begging to be asked. They are, however, different from questions that you think up with your conscious mind.

The difference with Mind Questions is that they have an agenda to them. Mind questions think they already know the answer, and want to show they are right. Mind questions have opinions behind them. Mind questions have been thought out. If you find yourself entertaining any question that smells like this, do not ask it. If you find yourself with a hunch-led question ask it, even if you think it is too intrusive, too bold, or none of your business. If it is a hunch-led question, it is begging to be asked.

Listening at this level may seem like it takes a lot of energy and time. It may and it may not, depending on the person and topic. You can apply this level of listening to a 30-second conversation or a three-hour one. Either way you will provide the other person with an extraordinary experience.

The single most impactful word that describes what is accomplished here is “honoring” another person.

This is truly a spiritual experience for people, along the lines of unconditional love. Honoring people at this level is probably not something anyone has done for them since they were in the formative years with Mom and Dad, or the romance months of a new love. Applying this level of listening to any relationship — whether business or pleasure — will expand your horizons tenfold. You will have people wanting to be in your presence … for no other reason than they find you interesting and feel better about themselves when they are with you.

Although a lot of what is offered here may not have been used in the following story, it is a great testimony to the power of listening:

Be the Most Interesting Person They Have Ever Met

Decades ago the editors of Psychology Today magazine staged an experiment to establish the effects of listening and asking easy, probing questions. Staff members flew to LAX from New York. The editor flew in later, with the intention of meeting his seatmate and getting to know him on the five-hour flight. For the duration of the flight, the Psychology Today editor asked questions and listened. He asked more questions based on what he felt his seatmate wanted to talk more about, and avoided areas he felt he didn’t. His total “purpose for being” during the five hours, was to have the conversation be all about his seatmate.

As suspected, throughout the flight the seatmate never asked anything about the editor, not even his name.

As the seatmate disembarked the plane, the staff for Psychology Today was there to interview him. They simply asked him what he thought about the man seated next to him on the flight (the Psychology Today editor, whose name he did not even know). He responded: “He was the most interesting man I have ever met.”

Moral of the story: Being interesting may have nothing to do with your deeds, your opinions or your stories, but rather your interest in others.

In my brief 30-plus years of being in the supercharged people business, I have seen clearly that we spend most of our waking moments in an addictive unconscious quest to be known, honored and loved. We need to be trusted, admired and respected, as well. We go to great lengths to feed this addiction from the money we seek to earn, to the good deeds we make sure we get done, to the stories we tell of it all. Knowing how important it is to all of us, imagine how unique a gift you can be to your ever-widening circle of influence by just giving it to them in every conversation.

The gift of listening is the gift of healing.

Please let me know your thoughts on this….

Accountability means accepting full responsibility for the consequences of our actions, and facing ourselves with the highest
degree of integrity.

Accountability is not an easy challenge. It requires us to exit our comfort zones, and to fully recognize all of our hidden motives,
agendas, and excuses. In a society that tends to focus on blaming the other guy, it becomes increasingly important for the individual to take responsibility for his/her own thoughts and deeds.

Universal law states that for every action there is an equal reaction.  Those that recognize this fully appreciate the responsibility for
every thought, word, and action they take. With this wisdom comes forethought, restraint, and awareness of intention. These moments of honesty and ownership give a sense of empowerment that can’t be found in continually playing the role of victim. Although it can be difficult to face situations with total honesty, it feels good when we do. Accountability is the first large step in reclaiming personal power and freedom.

Exercise:

Pay attention to an area where you have not accepted full accountability for your actions (and we all have at least one if we
are honest).

How have your thoughts shaped your intentions and actions?

Reflect on this and then make a statement accepting accountability for your role in this. How does this action affect you emotionally and spiritually? Have you allowed others to have power over you? Even when we are wronged by others, we have a choice to do
the right thing, or to justify the wrong ones.

You have a choice so, make it a better than terrific day!

Terry

Les Brown tells it like it is…  Success IS Within Your Reach.

But You’ve GOT To Be Hungry!

What does that mean?

Watch and see…

It’s important to have a positive attitude. Your attitude impacts everything you do and everything you say.

The good news it that you have total control of your attitude.  While some people take little to no responsibility for their attitude, you can set yourself apart from the pack by controlling your attitude and have a postive impact on others.

Life is a funny thing.  It is people that will sometimes hold us back.  It is people that will sometimes inspires us to be and do more than we thought we could ever be.

Take a moment to get back with “who” you are and more importantly where you want to go.

Don’t worry that people will judge you.  They will do that if you go after your dreams or not.

Don’t worry if you will fail or succeed. Pursue YOUR dreams.  What people think of you is none of your business.  The time is now for YOU to get on the path and to step UP and be all you can be. It is a long road…

Life is a like a marathon.

I started running marathons when I turned 50 years old.  For me they have been fun, hard work, very social (especially on the 3-4 hours runs), full of self doubt and limitations in the long stretches after running 24 miles, and definitely filled with pride on when finished.

Get passionate about life.  Get passionate about who you are.  Get passionate about where you are going.  Because there are so many people right now who need you in their life!

Creating your identity statement is one of the most important this that you can do to create happiness in your life.

This is how the law of attraction works.

It is a clear vision of the person that you are working to become.  It is the ultimate you.  It is not the person you are today.

This is so important.

Please take the time to work on your “Identity Statement” as so as you finish watching this video.  You will be so glad you did.

Best of Success,

Terry

Jim Rohn has been one of my mentors for decades.  His wisdom is priceless. Enjoy!

The Law of Attraction and the Science of Getting Rich What are you thinking about right now?

The Law of Attraction states that “whatever we think about, we bring about”.

This law may initially seem like new age fluff but believe it or not, there are scientific merits to this proposition.

The top quantum physicists of our time have discovered that our universe and our reality is very much directed by the “observer”. You can learn more below…

The Law of Attraction and the Science of Getting Rich

Being the Best You Can Be

Date Posted: February 12, 2009 Take a moment to imagine where our society would be, if we (people and businesses) allowed ourselves to believe we have no need for improvement. If we settled for “good enough,” instead of reaching for excellence. If in the afterglow of great success, we adopted an attitude of “We’ve arrived!” and neglected to ask, “How can we improve and reach the next level?”

One of the most unique and powerful gifts we all have is the ability to better ourselves every day, in every way. It is the ultimate opportunity to have the emotional, intellectual and physical faculties to identify and execute change. And it pays huge dividends, in both our personal and professional lives.

We can study a little every day, either by reading, listening to or watching something that will support us to make shifts in how we take care of ourselves and our future. Even the smallest steps can quickly compound into vast improvements in:

• Who we areHow we act How we react
• How we attract

The Japanese call it Kaizen … or “constant improvement.”

Let’s look at some areas of our lives where small daily improvements can add up to make huge differences over time:

YOUR HEALTH

What could be more important? Take care of your body; it is the only one you get. It could last well past 100 years of vitality and wellness. Here are a few things we can do every day:

1. Make one better decision about what you eat. Drop the sugar or salt you usually add to your food. Enjoy one less beer, or one more helping of fiber or greens. Move away from white flour. Stop buying the things at the grocery store that do not support your health. If they are not in the kitchen, you are not as likely to eat them. Rethink how you look at food: from a source of pleasure, to a source of necessary fuel. Food is fuel. Bad fuel causes engine failure. Good fuel wins races.
2. Drink more water. Put a gallon of water in the refrigerator and make it your goal to consume it every day.
3. Add one more physical activity. Walk the stairs instead of taking the elevator. Walk to the mailbox. Hire a personal trainer. Stretch. Do something fun and physical every day.
4. Take time to relax … even 20 minutes a day can make a difference. Give yourself permission to lie in the hammock or take a quiet bath.

YOUR WEALTH

This is your ticket to freedom, fun, adventure and contribution. Anyone can become wealthy. The level you need for freedom is different from others. Find your number. How much in assets and income do you want in order to live life to the fullest? Then do the following every day:

1. Add value to YOU as a professional. It does not matter if you are a chicken chopper or a rocket scientist … add value to your income-earning self. Learn something new that has value to your clients or employer. Add a new skill. Develop a new distinction. Form a new habit. Offer more of your professional self than you have before. You will earn more every year.
2. Save more. Save more of what you spend money on now. Look for ways to get the same value for less money. Buy a three-year-old car versus brand new. Eat out once less each month. Exchange full cable services for the basic. Anyone can figure out how to save $100 a month off just his or her existing expenses. One hundred dollars saved and invested over 30 years equals hundreds of thousands in wealth. Just $100 a month!
3. Invest more in appreciating assets, and less in depreciating assets. Appreciating assets include real estate, home improvements, your professional value, stocks and bonds. Depreciating assets include autos, entertainment, gifts and impulse purchases. Just by shifting a few hundred dollars you will add hundreds of thousands to your net worth.
4. Build a royalty residual income. Even when built part time, this residual income adds significant wealth. Five hundred dollars a month in residual income is, in itself, “worth” $50,000. The added $500 a month you invest in real estate or stocks can be worth hundreds of thousands over time. Residual income can come from a solid Network Marketing business, an online business, or writing a book about something for which you have a passion.

HOW YOU ACT

Are you kind? Are you compassionate? Are you generous? Do you give credit to others? Do you speak encouraging words? Do you speak about people’s strengths to others? Do you work enthusiastically? Do you do what you say you will do? Do you tell your truth when it could be a contribution? Do you listen to empower others?

How you and I act creates our value in the world … to the people around us like family, friends, coworkers and clients. When we act with excellence, speak with excellence, listen with excellence, and behave as excellent as we can in the moment, we are valued, we are attractive, we are trusted and we are loved.

Do these things every day to improve how you act:

1. Make a commitment to say something kind every day … then increase it to every hour.
2. Make the same commitment to do something kind every day. “Pay it forward.”
3. Make the same commitment to listen to someone … really listen to what they are saying, what they are not saying, what they really want to say, and how they feel. Listen to someone at a therapeutic level once a day.
4. Audit your conversations. Develop the habit of asking yourself after each statement, “What was my motive in saying what I said and how I said it? Was it to contribute to the person, or to make myself look good?” Then ask yourself how you feel about someone who speaks to make themselves look good, more important than you, or more “right” than you.
5. Make a bold request every day that will improve a relationship, business productivity, or will improve another person. For example, make a bold request that a friend or loved one stop speaking negatively about him or herself – battering their own poor self esteem. Or make a request that your spouse do something that you know will improve your love and relationship. When bold requests are made out of the context of support and improvement, they are often the tipping point that leads a person to act with excellence.

HOW YOU REACT

If actions are those things we think about (however briefly) before doing them, then reactions are those things we do without thinking. They are our built-in boomerang, over which we may feel we have no control or personal responsibility. Most people react in negative and destructive ways.

We can develop new “reactions” by developing new interpretations and habits. Here are some examples:

1. When someone speaks down to you, what do you think and how do you feel about it? What is your reaction? Do you feel they think you are smaller and less than them? Do you think they may be right? Do you react with anger and retaliation, or do you shut down? How would it change your reaction if, when someone spoke down to you, you “interpreted” that they, themselves, feel small and could really use a lift. This new interpretation gives you a perfect opportunity to engage in improving how you act (See steps 1-5 above).
2. When someone is late, do you think they disrespected you? How do you retaliate? What if instead, you interpreted their lateness as due to a life in overwhelm, a sick child, or someone being late for them? Do you see how that changes your reaction and gives another opportunity for steps 1-5 above?
3. When someone in authority tells you “no” or tells you to do something versus asking, how do you react? What if you interpreted that this leader is working on their path of developing compassionate leadership; that they have more responsibilities than they can handle and they need support? Again, see steps 1-5 above.

HOW YOU ATTRACT

Attraction is that mysterious energy that brings us a lucky outcome … the client or order we needed just in time; the idea that breaks the log jam and propels us into massive productivity; or the person that just popped into our life and filled a void, either romantically or personally. We all know people who seem to hit the jackpots of life, over and over again. We all know people who seem to always land on their feet and are always running with the wind towards their goals.

The lucky ones are those who were gifted by their parents with belief in themselves, such that they see every opportunity as a probability and inevitability. Everything can get done and should get done. No obstacle is too high or too wide. They deserve – not from an egotistical viewpoint, but from a spiritual abundance viewpoint – everything they choose to earn. They are the lucky ones. They are the one percent. About one out of 100 of us had parents lucky or wise enough to pass that gift on.

Now For the Rest of Us…

There is a path, proven a billion times, which will bring any of us the luck in life we so richly deserve. It is a simple path of vision and self motivation. It goes like this…

AUTHENTIC CORE VALUES

We each have a set of “rules” that makes us uniquely who we are. These rules define what is most important to us in life … what gives us life. To us, these rules are as essential as air and water. We must have them to be all we can be. Values are just labels for these rules … labels of the things we hold dear to us. There are no limits to the labels you can place on what you consider to be your authentic core values. Here are just a few examples:

Love … Fun … Adventure … Family … Spirituality … Leadership … Success … Discovery … Friendship … Excellence … Abundance … Honesty … Creativity …

The first step in the path, is to learn through self-discovery, self-listening and asking the right questions. What are your authentic core values? You will want to list them, keep them visually present, and refer to them as often as possible.

IMPOSED VALUES

We each also have a set of “rules” or imposed values. These are rules to live by handed down by authority figures in our lives, usually during our formative years (ages 1-5). Imposed values are not our authentic rules, but usually our parents’ rules; either authentic for them, or imposed by their parents (our grandparents). Here are some examples:

Hard Work … Education … Responsibility … Cleanliness … Success …
Family … Leadership … Spirituality … Security … Acceptance … Safety …

As you will notice, imposed values can also be authentic core values. What is authentic for one person, may be imposed for another. And just because your parents “insisted” that you live by a rule, does not mean it is not authentic for you. Identifying what is authentic for you is something only you can discover for yourself.

To capitalize on the laws of attraction, you will want to move away from living your life by any imposed rules. For when we live by imposed rules, you and I are always in conflict, always fighting, always resisting … and this is not the energy that attracts anything good.

Learn your imposed values, write them down and create a life plan to move away from them. This is not easy, nor will it usually happen quickly. And, it must happen for the real power you possess in your life to show up for you.

GIFTS

Each of us has also been fortunate to be given gifts. Gifts are those attributes that come naturally to us, and which contribute to other people. Gifts are not truly gifts if they cannot be contributed to the benefit of others. Examples of gifts are:

Love … Friendship … Leadership …
Creativity … Safety … Joy …
Listening … Honesty … Fun …

Learn your gift (or gifts) and again, write them down and keep them close to your daily living.

Once you know who you are (authentic values and gifts) you are ready to imagine what you want to do with your life, what you want to have in your life and, most importantly, who you want to be. This is as simple as writing a story … a story of how your life would be, could be and will be, if you could have it all.

Writing this story is like writing the screenplay of your life. It can be one page long or 100 pages long. It does not really matter, because for those diligent and deserving souls who get this far in knowing themselves, the rest is easy. The rest, as they say, is almost out of your hands.

WRITE YOUR STORY

As you write it, embrace the authentic YOU that has been uncovered. Write it with all the imagination of Walt Disney and then …

Learn to Believe It!

Most people in the world “believe” that beliefs are inherited, or are solely based on what has already occurred in one’s life. The truth is that all beliefs are learned, and most become self-fulfilling prophecies … meaning they became the truth because someone believed in them enough to make them true.There are three ways to learn to believe. Either by studying evidence of the intended belief, believing what an authority figure tells us, or just imagining it (affirming it) over and over and over again. Most of what you and I believe today – about life, people, religion and even about politics – we learned from the repeated affirmations by those whom we trust. We can have the same imprinting process on ourselves, by imagining and affirming our own story. When you have done this so often that you are starting to believe your imagined story, you will have created a vision. By definition, a vision is a story we fully believe, and which we expect to materialize. Visions, by definition, are inevitable. A vision attracts its components to it, like a magnet. A vision creates the motivation to bring it about. Motivation is that mysterious, powerful concoction of enthusiasm, courage, physical energy and creativity that makes things happen. Visions are lucky. Visionaries are the luckiest.

Find the true-blue you. Write the story of your future abundance. Learn to believe it is true for you. And then, all you have to do is hold on to being the best you can be.

You have a choice so, make it a better than terrific day!

Terry

Have you ever seen the little children in undeveloped, impoverished countries on the news? Notice how happy they seem, unless they are starving or sick (which many of them are). Have you ever wondered how that can be? How can children with so little – and with so little future – seem so happy, carefree and full of joy?Do you remember what you were like as a small child … say from the age of 3 to about age 10 or 12? Do you remember what you daydreamed about? What you loved doing or playing or learning? Do you remember anything about what you dreamed you would do someday when you grew up? Do you remember what was important to you? Was it Play … Winning … Friendship … Family … Nature … Adventure … Cooking … Creating … Caretaking?

The most authentic and, dare I say, personally evolved people on the planet are children.

When we were children, anything was not only possible, but expected. Anything we wanted, we believed we could have – and have right now. Anything we wanted to do, we believed we could do right now, without any interference or negotiating. The world was our oyster. It could be no other way – not because we were insecure, selfish clods, but because our very existence made the world our candy store, in which we had unlimited credit.

From that perfect cocoon, we developed a natural and permanent set of preferences about how we want to experience life. Some of us want adventure, others safety. Some creativity, others caretaking. These are what are often referred to in today’s psychology as our core values – those values that define our happiness, our peace and our power. As long as we get to do these things and embrace these preferences, we are in our groove and life is good – whether we are 7 or 67.

But just as we began to get into our groove – not long after we learn to communicate, discover our options, and gain some life experience – a powerful force (times two, in most cases) started to take shape in our lives. These two very powerful, very large forces were the key to our very existence, for they provided the home in which we got our most basic needs met: shelter and food. These two giants that permeated every second of our existence were, of course, our PARENTS.

Parents almost always have good intentions and almost always are a great contribution in our lives, beyond just keeping us alive. But for all of the good they are, parents are often the biggest challenge to our growing up to live out our dreams with that very early, very core set of very personal preferences … our core values.

You see, most parents missed Parenting 101, Childhood Psychology 102 and Authenticity 103 in school. They missed them because they do not exist. Parenting in our society usually follows the model of nature. It is expected to just be instinctive.

One instinct, which is certainly admirable, is wanting our children to be the best they can be … to be smart, strong and successful. More insidious is our desire for our children to be “right.” And what better way for them to be “right” than for them to be just like us. So early on, parents set out to make sure their children become just like them – with the right beliefs, the right habits, the right ethics, the right skills, hobbies, careers, religions; and even the right sports teams.

You may remember the relentless insistence that as a child you were expected by your parents to do things this way or that, see things this way or that, say things this way or that. Some of those lessons are so deeply ingrained they sing to us even today, like some old nursery rhymes. These are called imposed values.

Parents, with their inherent power and the barter of food and shelter, are no match for young children with nothing but naturally developed preferences. This creates an unavoidable conflict between imposed versus core values.

And so the process of becoming inauthentic begins. It began with the very first “should.” You should do this (in other words, you better do this, or else!). We learned to push our core values deeper inside of us … hiding them away for a safer day to play. We kept putting on the clothes laid out for us every morning and every night … the clothes we should wear. The clothes we must wear, or else. Layer after layer of who we should be — to be right, and to be acceptable, and to be loved. Each layer stole more and more of our spiritual self, our natural free-flowing essence … our power.

Sadly, even after our parents have passed, many of us live in fear of disappointing them. Can you see how insidious and powerful that internal programming is?

So how do you start to take off the layers of your parents’ hand-me-down clothes? The path of personal development is a path of authenticity. Authenticity is simply rediscovering and liberating our core values. Sometimes they are the same as some of our parents’. And always there are suppressed core values dying to be freed.

The more you and I live our lives to the tune of our own drummer, the more authentic and the more peaceful and powerful we are.

To support you in rediscovering your core values, I ask that you honestly answer the following questions:

Who would you choose to be and what would you love to do if there was no one (not any one … not your parents, grandparents, respected teachers, colleagues, friends, etc.) to stand in judgment?

What would you wear? What would your hobbies be? How would you spend your time and money?

In other words, who would you be if you had the full permission of everyone who loved you? Almost always we would be someone different than who we are.

Now, quietly and alone, begin to sculpt your authentic self – not from who you are now, but from who you are at the core. Peel off the layers. Let the Magnificent You shine through. Describe the Magnificent You in detail; write it down.

How do you look?
How do you feel?
What do you love to do and how do you do it?
What is truly important to you?
What sets you free?
What makes you feel your very best?
What lets you love freely?
What inspires and sets you on your path to greatness?

Write it all in the present tense, creating positive images with your words. Affirm it. Read it daily. Gather pictures, and music, and quotes to support it. Study it like you did your nursery rhymes as a kid … the songs and poems you learned by heart.

Think about what “by heart” means. It becomes part of who we are, existing in every cell of our body, laced throughout our spirit.

This process does work to peel off the layers of “others’ visions for you” and expose the true essence of you. It works because the process of visualizing the new you — regardless of your mindless chatter about it — over time trains your emotional, spiritual and unconscious self to believe and accept it.

It works because it is merely training the powerful part of you to shine again. It is already in there, always has been, covered up by a thousand wet blankets.

My greatest mentor told me in the late 70s that all personal power comes from self-honesty. I see authenticity as the same thing. Allowing ourselves to be the “real deal” lets our personal power run wild. It is an extraordinary process of rebirthing, if you will. This is one you can try at home.

Richard B. Brooke

For more than 200 years Americans have watched presidents and vice presidents get sworn into office on Inauguration Day. It’s a day of national renewal and leadership. Make this historic day one of personal renewal in your life.

Stedman Graham, educator, business leader and author of the new book Diversity: Leaders Not Labels — A New Plan for the 21st Century, says defining your personal relevancy is the key to taking ownership of your life. Here are his nine questions to help you discover what matters to you most and to achieve success:

• Step 1: Check Your ID — Who are you?
• Step 2: Create Your Vision — What is important to you?
• Step 3: Develop Your Travel Plan — How will you get there?
• Step 4: Master the Rules of the Road — How will you meet obstacles?
• Step 5: Step Into the Outer Limits — When should you take risks?
• Step 6: Pilot the Seasons of Change — How will you grow?
• Step 7: Build Your Dream Team — Who will you take along?
• Step 8: Win by a Decision — How will you make choices?
• Step 9: Commit to Your Vision — Where will you go?

“The nine-step success process helps you see yourself differently, based on investing in yourself, so you’re constantly evolving and changing for the better,” Graham says.

Six Ways to Take Charge of 2009

As the year comes to a close, it’s time to think about what you want next year to look like. Stephen Covey, one of the most prolific leadership authors of our time, says there are six things you can do right now to make 2009 your best year ever:

1. Be proactive.
It’s more than just taking initiative. It means being responsible for your own life. Empower yourself to lead and spread your influence no matter what position you hold.

2. Sharpen the saw.
Decide what’s truly important. Sharpen your saw early in the day by learning to say no to the unimportant and yes to the highly important.

3. Seek to understand before seeking to be understood. It’s human nature to want to be understood, but when both parties are trying to be understood, neither party is listening. By making the investment to understand the other party, you can magically transform the course of your conversations.

4. Begin with the end in mind. Start today with an image of the end of your life as the frame of reference by which everything else is examined. With a clear idea of where you are going, examine everything in the context of what matters to you most.

5. Develop a vision mission statement. Get a deep sense of your life’s mission, purpose and value system, then establish your goals and a system of accountability that keeps you on track.

6. Think win-win.There is enough success for everyone, so don’t view another person’s success as success achieved at your expense or exclusion.

The Four Greatest Lies of Success
Posted By: Richard B. Brooke
Date Posted: December 22, 2008 There are many pleasures in life that bring happiness. After more than 20 years of mentoring and coaching people from all walks of life, I have found that people seem to be happiest when they are in the process of achieving; when they are accomplishing something that is tremendously important to them. It’s the anticipation of getting your intended result … knowing you are on the right track … moving forward … in momentum … that makes you the happiest.

Do you remember when you bought your first car? Do you remember how you felt in the weeks, days and hours leading up to the purchase — that period of time when you knew you were going to get it, but you were still working on the financing or delivery?

These feelings are the essence of my definition of success.

Do you remember the promise you made to yourself and others about how the car would never see rain; you would never eat in it or abuse it in any way?

Yes, and then what happened after you got the car? Do you remember how those feelings slowly diminished? If you were like me, it only took a couple of weeks before you were driving through mud, eating a burger and fries and yes, back in those days, puffing away on a cigarette.

Achieving the result itself has such short-lived pleasure.

The essence of being truly alive comes from falling in love with the pursuit of your dreams … always stretching … always in momentum … always expecting the best.

Cultural Paradigms

The following are what can be called “cultural paradigms,” meaning they are the hidden rules of society. Sometimes they are in our face, placed there by our parents or other authority figures. Other times they are just the rules of the road; not so bold, but always there.

1. Desire Creates Success
   Most people confuse motivation with desire. We think because we want something badly enough, we will have the energy to get it.

   Yet, how many people do you know that have a strong desire for a great deal more in their life?

   And … how many of them have had that desire for a long time?

   How many are achieving it? The fact is, almost everyone desires health, wealth and happiness — and almost no one achieves all three. How many people do you know who even have two?

   Desire has absolutely NOTHING to do with motivation. Desire only creates the yearning for something, but not any of the actual magical energy it takes to stay on the path toward achieving it.

2. Hard Work Creates Success
   Do you want to be successful? Then work hard! But haven’t you been working hard? How many people do you know have been working hard their whole life? If you worked twice as hard as you do now … if you worked twice as many hours every day … would you be successful? (Or would you be divorced or dead?)

   I am not advocating not working hard. It just does not necessarily lead to you getting what you want. It is a great asset, but not the answer we have been led to believe it is.

3. Being a Good Person Creates Success
   Be a good person; I am not advocating anything else. But what does being a good person have to do with success? How many successful jerks do you know? Haven’t you seen the evidence that “money has no conscience?” It doesn’t care where it goes. Neither does health, and in many domains of knowledge, neither does wisdom.
4. Getting a Good Education Will Lead to Your Success
   Again, I am not advocating not getting as good an education as you can. Yet the world is filled with educated derelicts. Education does not insure anything. It confirms that we know how to study and pass tests. The age-old truth of getting great grades and getting into the best college is as good a strategy as working hard and being a good person. But it will not necessarily lead you to the good life.

THEN WHAT DOES LEAD ME TO GETTING WHAT I WANT IN LIFE?

The Secret to Success

Success is not getting everything you ever wanted, but rather moving forward toward what you want. Being in the process of achievement, and being in love with the process.

If thousands of people have found the secret to success, then it’s got to be self motivation. They may not know it as self motivation. Self motivation is that mysterious concoction of belief, confidence, positive expectations and creativity — a seeming abundance of physical, mental and emotional energy — that leads us to act powerful, naturally propelling us toward our goals.

Think About It

If you could get yourself motivated enough …

And keep yourself motivated enough …

What do you think you could achieve?

I love teaching and coaching people how to manage their self motivation to create a flow of desired results in their lives. That’s what Vision work is all about: learning to live life at Mach II With Your Hair on Fire! If you haven’t already, I encourage you to get a copy of my book and study it. It will guide you through the process of discovering and applying those energies that will get and keep you motivated, and on the path to your success.

Exercise is something that you can do for yourself that will make you feel good. You want to make sure that you are doing the best that you can with what you have. You should not sit back and just take life as it comes. You want to do the things in life that you want so that you are able to look back on your life and feel great.  One way to do this is to find the right exercise that works best for you.

Exercise is one of the best ways to feel good.  You want to feel great from the inside out.  There is nothing better than being happy and healthy at the same time.  When you have the right method of exercise, you will see that you can put your life on the right track and get your heart pumping.  Taking the time to put your health first is very important.  When you are able to grow as a person and use exercise as a method of release, you will feel good about who you are.

Getting out to do exercise is a good idea. You can join a gym to get out there and get motivated. Sometimes exercising at home is not always the best method for everyone.  There are many people that need the extra push to get them on the right track.  You can get involved with many of the local organizations and join a health club that will put your needs first.  This is a great idea that will help you strengthen your body and feel better about who you are and your personal growth.

If you are someone that can exercise from your home and stay motivated, you should do it. You can buy some extra gym pieces that you think will help you achieve your personal goals. You can get any thing that you want or like to help you get in shape.  You will see that once you start a good exercise routine, you will want to stay motivated and on track. This will get you the results that you want so that you can feel good about growing as a person.

Another way to exercise is to get outside and do what you want. You can play sports or take up a great hobby outside. You will enjoy getting out there and getting great exercise as well as getting fresh air that will help to get the blood pumping.  This is one way to feel great about you and to be able to make your body work hard at staying in shape. You will want to keep in shape so that you are able to look and feel your best.  Working hard is going to take some time, but eventually you will see that you can adapt to getting in shape and this will make you a better person.

Personal growth is something that you want to feel good about. You will want to make sure that you are proud of who you are and what you are achieving in life.  You will want to do something that will grab your attention.  You can join a club, find a great hobby or meet some new friends that will help you make your life better. This is going to be a great idea that will keep you feeling as good as you can. You will appreciate this when you see what a better person it makes you and how you start to feel about yourself.

I know for me, I have always done a little running/jogging.  Only about 20-30 minutes at a time.  Then I turned 50 years only and in the last year and a half I have run five 26.2 mile marathons.  It is work, not always easy but it has helped me in more ways than I can describe.  The method I follow is the JeffGallowy.com approach.

Be Well, I gotta run,

Terry Petrovick

Confidence is not something that comes easy to most. It is an emotion that has to be learned. You need to know what you can do to increase your personal confidence and how it can affect the way that you act and feel towards certain things in life. You need to think about what you can do to make your life better and what you need to do to boost up your self-esteem at the same time.

You should not worry about what other people think about you all the time. However, this is hard. You may not always be able to do this. It is difficult to move past the bad things that people do and say about us and we may have to find a way to get the confidence that is lost back. You can make your self-esteem grow if you have the right tools to do it with. You might have to let go and move on past these harsh words but it is the one thing that will get you where you need to be.

You need to learn to stand tall and be proud of who you are. When you are willing to feel good about who you are and what you are doing you will see the way that your emotional well being changes. You will notice a difference in the way that you act and the way that you feel in certain situations. You do not have to allow others to bring you down anymore. There is a way to move past this and to get to where you want and need to be.

You have to be able to allow yourself to grow from the inside out. You need to cleanse your body of the bad thoughts and allow them to be replaced by good ones. You are the only one that can determine your future. You need to put your own well being and emotions first so that you can achieve your goal of being more confidants and more in control of the things that matter most to you.

If you are looking for ways to boost your self-confidence, you can start by the people that you are associating with. You need to put yourself in good company. When you around people that make you feel good and care about you, this is a great way to make your confidence level rise and to get you feeling good about whom you are and improve your personal growth as well. This is an amazing feeling that will make you happier and healthier as well.

Do something for yourself. You need to make sure that you are putting yourself first in life. You may simply need a new haircut, brighter lipstick or a new outfit to make you feel more confident in your life. This will give you the feeling that you are beautiful and that you deserve the very best. Others will see the way that you feel and they will give you respect that you want and need too.

You also need to make sure that you have the right career path that you want. If you are not happy with the career that you have, you might want to change it. You need to do something that you are good at and that makes you feel good as well. There is nothing better than having a job that is satisfying and makes your confidence level rise about what it once was. This is something that will give you the personal growth experience that you are looking for as well.

See You At the Top!

Terry Petrovick

Hi Folks,

At 5:15 this morning I woke up knowing it was a time to make a state change for myself.

Perhaps a knowing the time has come to step things up a notch. Not a little but a lot.

Perhaps it was the conversation I had with Christina last night about getting to the next level of leadership, success and Quality of Life.

Perhaps it was one of the conversations I had with team members yesterday were I heard struggle and frustration and I felt pain for them.

Then I was presented with confirmation…a gift from my friend and mentor Tony Robbins.

I hope this video wakes you up like it did me. Live with passion!

Click here: Anthony Robbins Change Your Life Now

You have a choice so, make it a better than a terrific day!
Terry Petrovick